Monday 25 August 2014

Casting Call: Uncharted

I read the other week that Sony are ploughing ahead with development on an Uncharted movie, with a proposed release date of June 10 2016. Seeing as Uncharted is quite possibly the best PlayStation exclusive game ever (maybe except for The Last of Us), I'm pretty pumped. I love Uncharted

And whilst video game adaptations are hit and miss, Uncharted is perfect for the silver screen. It's as cinematic as video games come. Which is why I really, really don't want to see it get f**ked up. And hearing that Mark Wahlberg is attached to play Nathan Drake makes me skin crawl, eyes bleed and brain explode with disgrace. I mean, he's an okay actor, but he's no Nathan Drake.

So, I took it upon myself to draw up my dream cast for an Uncharted movie. Here's what I came up with...

Character: Nathan Drake
Actor: Chris Pratt

Chris Pratt is very much the man at the moment, having starred in The Lego Movie, the upcoming Guardians of the Galaxy and next year's Jurassic World. His fun, witty, snarky acting style, as seen in Guardians, would suit Nathan Drake and an Uncharted movie down to the ground. Seriously Sony, he's perfect. Get on the phone. Like, now.

He's sort of transforming into that one actor that everybody likes (a male J-Law?) and some viral YouTube hits have helped blow his exposure wide open. Not to mention, a loyal group of fans who have followed his scene-stealing work in Parks and Recreation. If you don't watch Parks and Rec - start, like, right now. It's hilarious.

Anyway, Drake is a handsome, confident ladies man with a quick mind, sharp wit and a interest in archaeology. He's basically a cross between Han Solo and Indiana Jones. Pratt has the looks, the ability and the background in action and comedy. Perfect match.

Alternatives: Bradley Cooper, Colin Donnell, Nathan Fillion (I know, he's old but he's so damn awesome).

Character: Victor Sullivan
Actor: Bruce Campbell

Now this is an actor whose name I've seen touted as perfect for Sully dozens of times now, and at first, I struggled to see it.

But, after a bit of thought, he's probably the best candidate. He's got the flowery shirt down pat (see right), the grizzly unshaven stuff can easily be moulded into a devilish moustache and he's got the charm also.

Couple this with some grey hair, a cigar and some snarky wisecrack and we've got ourselves a Sully!

Alternatives: Jeff Bridges, Tom Selleck (for extra moustache/cigar combo points)

Character: Elena Fisher
Actress: Rosamund Pike

She might have an accent as British as tea and crumpets, but I'd wager Rosamund Pike would be an excellent Elena Fisher. She's certainly got the looks, and as we've seen in things like Jack Reacher and David Fincher's upcoming Gone Girl, she's got the smarts also. Seriously, how creepy does Pike look in Gone Girl? She's playing a complex and layered but strong and determined female character, so this could be an Oscar bid from her.

Anyway, Pike has essentially what this character needs - we can't just cast any dumb Michael Bay bimbo to play a quick-as-anything journo like Elena. Hence, Pike is my pick.

Sure, she's starred in some trash over the years (Die Another Day, Doom) but she'd fit this role well but this means she's also no stranger to action. Win-win!

Alternatives: Margot Robbie, Sophia Myles, Elizabeth Olsen, Maggie Grace, Yvonne Strahovski

Character: Chloe Frazer
Actress: Lena Headey

Lena Headey, who's best known for her roles in Game of Thrones and 300, would be a great fit for the sexy, two-faced temptress Chloe Frazer.

As we've seen in the past, she's got a sultry side (300) as well as a badass side too (Dredd). Just couple these with a red top, flick of raven hair and two pistols and you've got yourself kickass accomplice to Drake, Chloe Frazer. The only thing Headey would need is some form of Kiwi accent to accompany...

She doesn't pop up until the second game, but the history hinted at with Drake would make it easy to work her into the narrative of a film based on Drake's Fortune, and create some love triangle tension.

Alternatives: Natalie Dormer, Olivia Wilde, Eva Green

Character: Zoran Lazarevic
Actor: Mark Strong

English guys are always the baddies, right? Alan Rickman, Tom Hiddleston, Alan Dale, Benedict name but a few recent examples.

No actor better encapsulates this than Mark Strong, someone who seems to have been handed every single villainous role in Hollywood over the last few years (Sherlock Holmes, Green Lantern, Welcome to the Punch, Robin Hood, Kick Ass).

It's for this reason that he'd fit the role of Serbian murderous mercenary warlord Zoran Lazarevic from Uncharted 2 - and I mean that in a nice way! He'd have to bulk up somewhat, but he's such a dab hand at being that angry villain that he'd handle it in his sleep.

Plus, he is bald. Essentially, he's already half-way to getting the role.

Alternatives: Ben Kingsley, another English actor with a villainous streak.

Character: Charlie Cutter
Actor: Graham McTavish

Well, that's just cheating.

Graham McTavish, best known for playing that one dwarf with the bald head and two badass axes in the Hobbit (I think his name is Borkin or Bwalin or something), actually already played the role of Charlie Cutter in Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception.

So, casting him in movie adaptation is two things; sort of cheating, but it also makes a lot of sense. He looks and sounds like Charlie (you don't say?!), so that's that.

What about Jason Statham I hear you cry? No. Just no.

Alternatives: Any actor who looks tough and sounds remotely Cockney. Except Jason Statham.

Okay, so those are my thoughts on a cast for the Uncharted movie - I haven't gone into detail on every character (there are a fair few) so I'll leave those open to suggestions in the comments! Actors for Gabriel Roman or Talbot? What about Marlowe or Harry Flynn? Let me know!


  1. Never played he game, but this was an interesting read. Bruce Campbell looks perfect based on the pics you used. Plus he's all sorts of awesome. Nice write up.

    Oh, you no like Statham, eh?

    1. As videogames go, Uncharted is as 'film-like' as it gets - you should definitely check it out :) And no, not a fan of the Stath. Guy grinds my gears.

  2. Please send this to SONY...please



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